"Hey there, so do you like Donkeys?"
Right there is the ultimate ice breaker of all time. Why? It's the common denominator for all women. Everyone knows that ALL women love donkeys.
Remember as kids when girls would have posters of puppies and kittens? We all know that is because they were always low on posters of baby donkeys frolicking in the fields. And of course you remember girls playing with My Little Pony. We all know that My Little Pony were the cheap knock off version of My Little Donkey. It was like what the Gobots were to Transformers.
What is a synonym or Donkey? That's right....ASS. It subconsciously gets girls thinking of ass so when you walk away put a little swivel in your hips and the ladies will be leaving a trail on the bar stool like a snail. A stimulating conversation about donkeys will do nothing but have her conjuring up happy nostalgic memories while thinking about your ass. That is what you call a win-win.
Let us also not forget how this can be used as a screening process. If a woman doesn't like donkeys do we really want anything to do with her? Any woman who can't see the beauty in a donkey definitely has some deep seeded issues. You should suggest a good psychiatrist to see and then run until you can't run no more. Drink some Gatorade and stretch and run and run and run until you can't run any more.
I am actually shocked how many ladies in NYC don't love donkeys, and I find it rather disturbing.
ADDED BONUS....When she ultimately starts to get turned on from all of the donkey talk, whisper in her ear "Hee Haw." It will send her over the top. I hope you have a pocket full of condoms and a dental dam.
Enjoy this weekend and let me know how the donkey talk works out.
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3 comments:
donkeys are fun, just like midgets
Hee haw. Kinda sounds like Yee Haw, which reminds me of cowboys, which ultimately makes me think of people who "ride things", dammit. Now there is a bad porn playing visually in my head.
Did it work on Bessie Walton?
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