I was watching the scene where Rabbit in 8 Mile is getting ready to go on stage and had memories of my High School sex education class rushing back to me. My stomach was full of butterflies and palms sweaty as my turn was next to simulate sex with the CPR dummy for the final exam. Remember how nerve racking it was when you had to do it?
My friend Skippy had his heads buried in his hands next to me as he got an Incomplete because the pressure got to him and couldn't hoist the main sail. I was watching my friend Marty as he gyrated his hips from side to side instead of the traditional up and down humping motion. Coach Robinson instantly diagnosed Marty as being dyslexic and sent him down to the "Rainbow Room".
The week before we had what Coach called a dry run. There weren't enough girls to go around so some guys had to pair up. I unfortunately got paired up with Ming Lu, a Chinese exchange student with a very deep voice, and had to wear a yellow vest symbolizing that I would be the girl in the relationship. Ming's dry humping was rather disturbing, and his jeans made my inner thighs chafe.
Coach blew his whistle and called my name. It went bad from the start as the cuff in my jeans got caught on the edge of the desk. I shook like a leaf the whole time until Coach blew his whistle. Coach's criticism was constructive, and he told me to not use my teeth in the real world when trying to get her bra off and to think about baseball. It is Coach that made me the world class lover I am today.
To this day, just a glimpse of a CPR dummy gives me the tingles as I think back to the day where that CPR dummy took a pale uncoordinated boy as she set him on the journey of becoming the masterful lover who has been documented to last up to 7 minutes.
I was surprised when I recently found out that the after school tutoring sessions by the custodian weren't sanctioned by the school. I guess Jack was one of those kind old men that liked to see young boys through difficult times. He took time out from his schedule to teach me, and it brings a tear to my eye to think that there are selfless and caring old men like that out there. He even offered to replace the Coed Naked t-shirt that he stained.
Well I am sure we all have some funny stories from simulating intercourse with the CPR dummy in High School health class. Those were the days right?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment